My knowledge…

… of world history seems to be lacking.

I’ve been watching “Mr. Selfridge”, a TV show about the man, an American, who started Selfridge’s Department Store in London just after the turn of the century.

What’s strange to me is that I’ve always seen the UK and Europe as much more progressive than the US, but I think they’re actually just, perhaps, a little ahead? Maybe not on women’s suffrage as the US gave women the right to vote in 1920 and it took until 1928 for Britain to give women equal voting rights. But there is the whole “healthcare” thing. I’m not interested in starting mindless political rants here. All I have to say about healthcare in the US is that if you’re going to set yourself up as the industry that is the *gateway* to doctors here in the US and then deny people access to your product (insurance) based on a *number* (BMI) and nothing else – you deserve government regulation. This has happened to me in the past. I don’t know if it is better now, but the “denying people access to insurance simply because they’re not your ideal of a *number*” thing? Not acceptable. Or maybe medical care could be more affordable, but then we’d have to subsidize the education of doctors. And their liability insurance. It might be nice if people didn’t sue just for a fun time (and money) but then we’d have to readjust the justice system in this country….

And while I’m alienating followers left and right, I might as well give a shout out to Pope Francis. Dude, I think you’re pretty cool, but until you dig all of the gold out of walls of St. Peter’s and start using it to *actually* help the poor I’m not going to take you seriously on your speeches regarding redistribution of wealth. I would call it a ‘refurbishment’ of the cathedral. You can fix it with paint. We have gold colored paint now. I saw some at Lowe’s. I’ll bring some with me to share the next time I’m in Rome. (I’ve probably just gotten my passport flagged…) Now that everyone thinks I’m about desecration of history, I’ll move on.

How to tie all of this into what I’m writing? I don’t have a way, really. This is merely more random thoughts from a deeply disappointed person. I was trying to focus last night. I was trying to finish ‘editing’. I was trying to simply get through Chapter 12, but I couldn’t focus, so I put it away (or off to the side where the cat can chew on it) and went to bed. I even had a great scene in my head yesterday that I had been hoping to write down, and fortunately I still have it, but not as vividly. Not with near as much excitement.

Perhaps I need to be done with people. Someone I know is considering starting a blog about being a “Recovering People Pleaser” I could probably learn something from that, except I’m not in recovery. I’m still doing it. The definition of insanity is *not* “the practice of doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result” but maybe it should be. I continue to be a doormat, people continue to use me as such. I do it over and over again thinking that the next time I go out of my way for someone, they’ll really be my friend. They’ll really like me. They’ll be honest.

Nope.

I continue to be a doormat.

Over and over again.

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