Last month I participated in WordPress’ Writing 101 workshop and one of the exercises really struck me as fun. The exercise was to explore voice and giving specific voices and tone to your characters. My cats are as different as can be. This is what I imagine they would sound like if they had lips and spoke English. I hope to make this a regular Friday posting.
“The sofa’s my favorite.” With a languid stretch Ember T. Cat rolled onto her back and held her four white paws in the air – a sharp contrast to her fellow feline, Inkblot T. Cat, who sat regally on a folded grey blanket with her paws daintily tucked under her, tail wrapped neatly around her body. On top of a pillow. On the sofa.
“Everything is your favorite.” Inkblot replied with a sniff. She blinked with obvious disdain for the calico.
A limp flop brought Ember onto her side so she could stretch. Again. “Not true! The Mommy tried to give me this green leafy thing the other day. That wasn’t my favorite.”
“I remember. You ate it.”
“Well, yeah, but I didn’t like it. Why wouldn’t I at least try it?”
Inkblot’s green eyes narrowed at the obviously daft younger cat, “You don’t try it because the humans will think it is easy to get us to like them. They must think they have to work hard for our love. From now on you must turn up your nose at treats and only eat them when the human’s back is turned. You will not go to bed until approximately fifteen minutes after they have turned out the lights. Under no circumstances will you climb into their lap…”
“But I love the Daddy’s lap! And he likes it when I come asking for for lap time! It’s my favorite!”
Inkblot sat up with an abrupt flick of her tail, “Precisely! We are not here to appease them. They are here to serve us!”
“They do serve us. Every night a little after the big ball of light has disappeared.”
“Are you referring to the sun?” Inkblot asked with a flat stare.
“Whatever. ” Out of the corner of her eye, Ember caught the tiny motion of something behind her. She watched it, eyes transfixed. Suddenly she jumped up, pounced, and bit… her own tail. Again.
Inkblot rolled her eyes and settled back down into the blanket the humans had obviously placed specifically for her.
*I realize the … irony… in making my first Feline Friday post on a Thursday, but tomorrow is a holiday and I put the wrong date into the post scheduler. Heh. Technology.